I honestly could not think of a better title to illicit hate and discontent among my potential readers than “It’s Your Fault You are Unemployed.” This was done on purpose and I am sorry but I believe what I have to say is important enough that I don’t mind or care if you hate me afterward.
The reason you are unemployed was most likely not your fault when you lost your job. The reason you are still unemployed probably is your fault entirely. The reason you had to take a menial job somewhere else that isn’t adequate is also your fault. Stop blaming the economy, government, and your ex-employer. The responsibility of providing yourself a way out of your job was your ball to drop.
Getting yourself out of this mess is going to take a long hard look in the mirror and a realistic (adult) approach at managing your situation without having your emotions and feelings getting in the way. I have been unemployed I have felt that sinking feeling knowing there was nothing I could do about. Having the universe conspiring against my happiness is a feeling I am well versed in. The old saying goes never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes. I have and I think it is still your fault you are unemployed but I know a way you can get out of it.
My process is very painful and humbling and requires more sacrifice than you may be willing to subject your family to. I understand completely and came to the same conclusion so I recognize my own hypocrisy in asking you to do things I didn’t have the heart to do personally. If I had I probably would have lightened my load considerably but ego, pride, and stubbornness prevented me from doing the things I thought necessary for me to reverse course. I am telling you to do them because the fact I didn’t have the heart to do them myself is mute to the fact that they were still necessary.
1. Your old life and the income it was based on are in the past. Quit living like nothing has changed.
Your old job is gone and that check isn’t coming in anymore. If you are living off your savings and/or any severance or unemployment now is the time to trim any financial obligations that you can before they blow up on you. The things that are most important to do are usually the most painful. We are living in times of the long term unemployed you cannot assume something is going to pop up just because you really need it to. I don’t know your financial situation but things like a mortgage or second car payment may need to be cut completely before they drag you into the abyss.
Disposable income is something you had in the past… not now. Things like your smartphones, cable TV, eating out, buying anything but the essentials are no longer part of your world. I know your credit rating is important but its just a number and not worth your family suffering for one hour much less one day. Humans survived just fine for thousands of years without a Transunion score, you’re going to be fine. There is nothing that can happen that will prevent you from getting it back in the near future. Even a bankruptcy can be cleared in a few years. Cut your financial ties and walk away from anything that does not include food, shelter, or security.
You need to write out an iron-clad new budget that reflects your new reality. If you are fooling yourself using money you don’t have to buy things you don’t need now is an awesome time to stop.If you are willing to make the sacrifice and your spouse isn’t then close out the account move to another bank and do not add them to the account.(Incidentally, this is the one I failed at much to my own suffering) Financial prudence is key to your own recovery and nobody with any sense will blame you for it. Only idiots judge people when necessity forces decisions that would otherwise be unthinkable. If you think these measures are too harsh look at your three year old daughter and think what it would be like to not be able to buy her food or milk because you are broke. That was the result of me not making the hard choices I needed to make. This self-reflection is key to prioritizing your finances into things that really matter and everything else.
You should always remember that the reason you are in a financial mess is not because you lost a job in a crappy economy. The reason you are in a mess is because you allowed your spending to strip away what could have been a substantial nest egg capable of seeing you through this hard time. The Church of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) have guidelines of having a surplus of a year’s worth of food and financial security. No matter what religion or beliefs you hold that is a remarkably prudent example that should have been followed by every American. We are the richest country on earth by far. Skimming our lifestyle down to allow for hard-times was advice we should have listened to. Our grandparents told us about the depression and the hard times but we didn’t listen.We were so smug in our beliefs we laughed when they told about burying money in the backyard……. How would a jelly jar of twenties help you right now?
2. Unemployment is a temporary situation and you will find another job.
This one strikes a personal cord with me because everyday I hear about the unemployment rate being artificially low because of the people who have given up looking for a job. If you have given up then you deserve everything that is happening to you. I will give the shirt of my back to someone who is still fighting all the way to the mat but if you give up I will always consider you a failure.
Treat everyday as if you are going to do something epic. Get up and get ready for work even if you have no idea where you might be going. Sitting around in your sweatpants trying on a new beard hasn’t gotten anyone employed in history to my knowledge. The difference is mental and you need to be ready on a subconscious level for your next step.
The roadblocks you have built for yourself are keeping you down. The economy, job situation, and rumors are what are enabling the deception but the main hangup to you not working is you. You are not any different than any other person who has come before you. The skills and weaknesses you have are unique to you. The power of having a job is in your hands and can be realized in just a few days. This may not be the job you want. This job may not pay what you think you are worth. That does not change the fact that you need to be working right now and striving to be the hardest working, most honest, and dependable employee they have ever seen. I don’t care what job you pick up. Bagging groceries or digging a ditch may be below your skill level but who is keeping score anyway. Seneca has been quoted as saying” if a man does not know to what port he is steering then no wind is favorable to him.” If you need and want a job and a new career then the best move is to start a new career and move with confidence as an employee and a survivor. The world is too full already of people without a sound work ethic who are too good to work.
3. Establish what your goals are financially and as a career in detail and give yourself a 3 month to 5 month window to meet them.
Long-term goals are for the lazy and give you the option of allowing little things to get in the way of big important things that make you uncomfortable. A sample short term goal would be to take the income you have coming meet your bare bones household needs within a month. This is possible by cutting everything that is not essential. Everything that can be cut shall be cut…period. If you don’t want to pull your kids out of private school because the public schools are awful you better brush up on your homeschooling. There is always a way around spending money. You need to be a Zen master of not wanting anything that has a dollar figure attached to it. Almost everything in your life is a luxury. Once you have cut everything and pushed every dollar until it screams find a way to make enough money to meet that amount. You might be there already with income from a spouse and/or unemployment benefits. If you aren’t anywhere close you aren’t cutting deep enough.
The career goals you set for yourself are more long term in nature but they only serve as a way-point to give you something to work toward. Having a firm goal with a specific end result is essential to making shorter term goals that move you in that direction. Be very specific and visualize yourself attaining the dreams you have always held for yourself. Shooting for the stars doesn’t mean that you will ever catch one but it does a great job keeping your head out of the mud. Dream big if your going to dream. If you want a Corvette then figure it in your goal and actively chase having a Corvette. If you fall a bit short and can only afford a nice car at the end. Give yourself another few months and keep chasing it. Compromise is a shitty motivator, if you want something admit it to yourself and go get it.
Once you have established where you want to go give yourself a few first steps of how to get there. If it involves training then start your G I Bill paperwork now as they are so slow it might take a few months before you ever see that monthly stipend check. Even if you have no idea what you want you need to be in school.
Unemployed and suffering when a free education backed by a living stipend is a phone call and internet form away is just dumb. Who cares if you don’t want to go to school again. Treat it like a job and try to enjoy yourself. Who knows you might even learn something in the process. Snot nosed naive college kids do it every semester you are going to be fine. The secret to college is pretty simple show up and try hard and you will be successful.
4. Establish multiple streams of income
You are in this mess because you based your income on what someone else decided you were worth. In my world I decide what I am worth and ask those around me to agree with me. I have several streams of income that operate completely independently of each other and you should also. Losing one would be an inconvenience but would not sink the ship. The G I Bill is a stream of income. Your spouses income is just another stream. Everything you do, every hobby you have should move you toward making cash or building a asset.
The reality of the connected world is that you are capable of being a millionaire next month if you play your cards right. You odds of hitting it big in a world where everyone in the world is connected over the internet is exponentially better than the lottery ever could be for those who want to try. Everyday an idiot becomes wealthy on the internet because they thought of something you didn’t. Facebook had a record setting IPO without ever producing a product you could hold in a single hand. That is an example of internet potential. He is a billionaire and you are eating Mac&Cheese because he thought of something profound and had the courage to try.
While the reality exist the likelihood of you becoming filthy rich is remote. The beauty of the internet is the start-up cost and ease of internet business. You could start a dozen companies tonight if you so desired for probably less than the cost of a pizza and case of beer. Will those companies make you a fortune…. No. Could they possibly bring in a few extra hundred dollars a month while you are sleeping…… Yes. If you set these companies up correctly the products sell themselves. The key is finding an under served niche market. Then dominate it. I don’t like being the best in an industry I like being the only one in the industry.
5. Working your way out will be done 20 Dollars at a time
The path to being a millionaire is the same for not being broke. Focus on making or saving 10 to 20 dollars at a time and the end result will be wealth. There is no other way to break it down. Do not ever spend a dime you do not have to until you have a nest-egg put back, your out of debt, and you have enough streams of income to cover you if you lose your biggest one. Until then you are living on borrowed time and are one bad day away from disaster again. While all economic hardship is sometimes unavoidable its easier to deal with the loss of 50 percent of your income if the other 50 percent is still coming in. That is why the nest-egg is so important.
Wealth is not an abstract number. The attainment of “wealth” is not a relative term although people treat it like it is. The real value of wealth is a simple math problem you could do on the back of a napkin.
Wealth = how much you have ÷ $ amount per month you need to be happy
Your end result is how many months wealthy you are at your chosen lifestyle. You should be at a number around 6.35 months. If your an average American you are around .25 months. By putting this on an easily computed figure you can easily see how cutting your expenses by 25 percent a month and putting the month back would have a multiple benefit on not only lowering your monthly rate by 25 percent but increasing the amount you have in reserve buy another 25 percent of monthly income.
Tell me is it easier to double your wealth by increasing your income by double or decreasing your withdraws by half? Which do you have more control over in your life. While doubling your income might be unattainable in the short-term adding another 15 percent can be done fairly easily usually. When coupled with a reduction in monthly expenses of 35 percent which is fairly easy when you want to you have essentially done just that. A combination of a side business and not eating out or wasting money for a month could have a net effect of doubling your income for all practical purposes.
This is why you being unemployed is your fault. The loss of your job was simply the nail in your financial coffin but could have been mitigated by proper planning on the front end. I had to go through it myself a few years ago before I learned how the system works. To get out of this you need to start fresh and new with a new and better plan that doesn’t involve you flying by the seat of your pants. Establish a system of checks and goals that will work for you in the long term.
Now feel free to flame away and be sure to send it to all the other people who got laid off with you so they can hate me too. Only a few will understand what I am trying to say but hopefully they will get it. The anger of the rest are a small price to pay.
Unemployed Heroes 
Posted on 2012/06/17
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